Meet Tahnee

Friday, January 26, 2018

Season 2, Episode 1: How Do You Solve a Problem Like Glenn?

After Thanksgiving, things get kind of hairy with Glenn. He takes up residence on the couch, and his favorite pastimes become slothing, mooching, and eating people's leftovers out of the fridge. 

Marie, desperate for her perceived relationship to be successful, loses herself in bringing Glenn snacks and generally trying to please him. The light goes out behind her eyes. 

Meryl realizes that if she doesn't intervene, Marie might fall down a dark rabbit hole of dysfunction. Not to mention, she might never get this drifter out of her house. So Meryl comes up with a project. 

Meryl employs Marie to redecorate the house, room by room, removing all the stale old wallpaper that Meryl's grandmother originally put up. This will take a very long time. Meryl gives herself a mental pat on the back for being so clever. 

Marie tears down the wallpaper with her bare hands, which doesn't surprise anyone because she's a hard worker, a die-hard. Meryl hopes that Glenn will soon be a thing of the past, but who's to say what Marie is thinking about as she claws that paper off the walls? 

One thing is for certain, Marie finds something intensely satisfying about ripping the paper off the walls, sheet by sheet.

When she's finished, Marie is filled with accomplishment, mingled with aches and pains in her hands, neck, legs, and back. But what's next to come is the best yet. It's time to redecorate. The house is a blank palate. 

The new decor comes solely from Marie's imagination and deepest inspirations. Meryl generously allowed her to select the colors and art work herself and to go ahead and set up the house anew. 

Eclectic is the best way to describe it as a whole, but the Southwestern influences in the living room are not to be overlooked.  

The new living room offers Gene a lofty place to dream and surf the internet, while providing ample comfort for the cats.

The foyer is inspired by a recurring dream Marie has where she's dragged by wild horses to her untimely demise. When she wakes up in a cold sweat, she finds the best way to calm herself is with a midnight snack, including, but not limited to, cereal, pastries, wine coolers, tacos, or anything she can find. 

The kitchen tile shines in the sunlight, and it should... Marie layed the tile herself, square by square, and polished it with a rag and club soda, and sometimes her tears as she thought of how Glenn was likely a fixture on some new girl's couch by now, being fed snacks by her, and eating the leftovers belonging to her roommates. 

The upstairs hall has become a quirky place to pop a squat and read the daily newspaper, if you're into nostalgia. 

Meryl's room of course is a grand affair... 

A vanity is a very personal space, so Meryl goes ahead and sets this up herself. This week she's honoring Gregory Peck, her model for what a man should be. It's her one photo vision board. 

Here, Meryl can kick off her slippers and read, or she can go to her altar and put her studies to practical use. The dogs often like to lounge in Meryl's room. Some say it's a portal to another dimension. 

Gene's room has become an even more extravagant den of slack, to borrow a phrase from one of her favorite films

Now, thanks to Marie, Gene can listen to her records, sip corn whiskey, read the Bible, or partake in any number of her favorite activities in a plush and psychedelic atmosphere. 

It's worth taking note that Gene has graduated from a bare mattress on the floor and now sleeps in a slightly rickety four poster bed someone was giving away on Craigslist. It's a big hit with the dogs. 

The third floor hallway is a place where one can listen to the old phonograph or watch a little TV. And by a little TV, I do mean a "little" TV, a small vintage television set that once belonged to Marie's dear old parents. 

Then there's the computer room/Marie's room. Gene was also able to find three pieces of a five piece sectional someone was giving away to serve as the computer room couch/Marie's new bed.  

When she's not putting the finishing touches on the house, Marie has been stealing away to her newly decorated digs to read romance novels.

And finally, the most important room in the house, the loo. Those who enjoy long baths will be pleased to meet the new shell-lined, candle-studded tub. God knows, Yippy is a fan. 

All in all, Meryl feels pretty innovative for getting Marie involved in something other than an unhealthy relationship with a cling-on and getting the house redecorated at the same time. "How do you do it?" she sometimes says to herself in the mirror, a rhetorical question of course. 

And then her thoughts drift to Grenadine, poor cousin, poor soul... No one has forgotten "the incident," least of all Meryl. 

Friday, November 24, 2017

A Dollhouse Thanksgiving Special: Marie Meets Someone

In the wake of Grenadine's unfortunate incident, the household gathers to celebrate Thanksgiving in spite of their worried hearts. Meryl has prepared a turkey in the hopes of bringing everyone together.

Gene stares longingly across the table at Vlad, hoping for a Thanksgiving miracle...

Meryl tries to redirect Gene's attention to the turkey to avoid an altercation. 

The bird is exquisite, marinated in whiskey and garnished with potatoes, carrots, brussels sprouts, and pepperoni. Meryl cooked all day. Everyone is hungry for the bird. 

Just as everybody is ready to dig in, Marie brings an extra chair downstairs, raising eyebrows across the table. 

Before anyone can ask any questions, a stranger saunters in. He has a sleeping bag under one arm and a carton of Kools under the other. 

"Meet Glenn," says Marie, as if she's rehearsed his introduction. "He's joining us for dinner as my personal guest."

Strangely, he's also bought a suitcase with him...

Dr. Leslie and Opal are relatively new here themselves, so they try to ignore the awkward quiet that has come upon the room. They just want to eat. 

Vlad, on the other hand, wants to get a better look at Glenn. 

He walks around the table protectively. His intensity makes the good doctor sweat. 

Without waiting for a response, Marie offers Glenn a seat at the table. Vlad stares uncomfortably at the newcomer, sizing him up. 

Glenn has also brought a bottle of Wild Turkey with him, but it appears to be for him alone to drink, as he offers a sip to no-one. 

Vlad turns to Dr. Leslie and whispers, "Have you noticed anything odd about Glenn?"

The doctor takes in Vlad's concerns and promises to keep his eyes open. 

Finally, everyone is seated. Meryl suggests going around the table and sharing something each person is thankful for.

Marie is thankful to have met someone. Meryl is thankful for family, cousins and roommates alike. And Glenn says he's always thankful for a free meal and a bottle of booze. 


After dinner, night falls and everyone retires to the living room for coffee and dessert. Opal fluffs Dr. Leslie's pillow, never wanting him to be uncomfortable. Gene reclines into a food coma, for she has eaten the most pepperoni. Vlad wishes he could relax, but he's on guard, never taking his eyes off of Glenn. 

Friday, November 17, 2017

Season 1, Episode 14: The Breakdown (Season Finale)

One night after dinner, Meryl sets out on a walk to sort through her feelings and put some good vibes out into the Universe for Grenadine's success in therapy... when all of sudden, she happens upon a large black creature lying lifeless in the street. 


Meryl grows increasingly uneasy as she stands contemplating the creature. She feels it is an omen, a harbinger of something terrible to come, but what could it be? She decides to turn around and go back to the house at once. 


Meanwhile, around the corner just a few feet away, Grenadine has stumbled out into the night, alone and unnoticed wearing only her bathrobe... Her mind is wet with the whiskey she's managed to sneak in spite of the good doctor's watchful eye. What's worse, she has climbed to a dangerous height, recklessly bent on destroying herself once and for all. 


All of Grenadine's slow unraveling has brought her to this moment. With Vlad seemingly liberated from her control, Grenadine feels she has nothing left. All she's ever known is a life where her sole purpose was to care for and direct her elfin brother. Now that he's gone, lost to Gene's lusty influence, Grenadine sees no purpose nor reason to go on. She steps closer to the edge. 


 The fall is quick. Grenadine's body is as light as a doll's. 

Here Grenadine lies all night long. It's well morning before the house forms a search party. When finally they set out, they are unprepared for what they find just around the corner... 

Friday, October 27, 2017

Season 1, Episode 13: Therapy

Grenadine finally sits down with Dr. Leslie for their first session. The plan is to meet daily in the computer room for comprehensive analysis sessions. He starts in with something simple, "So... Where do you hail from?"

Grenadine tells Dr. Leslie that she belongs to the Slavic Union, but he says he's never heard of that... "Is that near Russia?" he asks her?  


Dr. Leslie decides to shift gears and asks Grenadine what her favorite color is... She says, "Color is for Zadrota."


Although Dr. Leslie does not speak Russian or understand what Grenadine means, he gives himself a mental pat on the back for getting her to open up... 


Meanwhile, Marie has come up from a hard day of work looking for a nap, but, alas, her room is occupied, and so she remains perpetually displaced. 


Downstairs, Opal has borrowed Gene's computer so she can work on her online nursing degree. Gene peers over her shoulder and wonders if Dr. Leslie's school is accredited... 


As Gene is on her way back up to her room to listen to some sad ballads on the record player, she catches Vlad coming out of the bathroom with his old-time-girls photographs tucked under his arm. She corners him. 


She tells him that he's all she has and if things don't work out, there aren't enough sad ballads in the world to absorb her pain... What she's trying to say is that she wants to make out. 


Vlad's heart floods with anxiety. He can sense that Gene is not to be thwarted. 

Dr. Leslie closes his session with Grenadine and makes a mental note that she's very crafty. She knows how to sleep with her eyes open...